Wednesday, November 11, 2015


Velveteens are magically animated stuffed animals.  They are soft and delightful--little happy things that only dance, cuddle, and take naps on your lap.  They behave in all the ways that you wish your cat would.

They are only owned by the rich, because no one else can afford to use magic in such a trivial way.  Or more specifically, the children of the rich.

They are usually sold with a velveteen-slave, whose has the job of ensuring the integrity and cleanliness of the stuffed animal.

As you would expect, they are fabulously expensive.  Steal a velveteen from a princess and you're set for life.  Many have killed and died to get their hands on a velveteen.  It is difficult to sell one, however, since they are each unique and well-known (at least among nobles, who often show their wealth off to each other).

The details of their manufacture are a closely-guarded secret, but they are produced by the Armenjero "Empire", a cliffside mecca for bards and gypsies.  It is famous for it's gambling, and it was won from an archmage of Meltheria in a game of chance.  

One big caveat is that velveteens are condemned by the Church, which claims that they are animated by the souls of the dead.  Velveteens are sufficient to warrant a full investigation by the Church's witch hunters, who will track down the velveteen, interrogate it (fruitlessly, because all they do is wiggle and play), and torture it before burning it to death.

The proof they offer is this: velveteens can be turned by clerics, just as undead can.

How To Use Them In Your Game

Add them to your loot tables.  They're a hell of a lot more interesting than another emerald the size of a baby's fist, and worth about the same.

If nothing else, they can be used to set off traps or something.


  1. These are amazing, I especially love that they can be turned. Now I'm imagining the players opening the door to the vault and a velveteen, bursting with loneliness, comes flying out like a gray streak and hugs one of the PCs' legs.

    1. And the PCs then turn it? Or smash it? Or interrogate it (fruitlessly, because all they do is wiggle and play), and torture it before burning it to death?

  2. Well done again. I keep thinking of Teddy Ruxpin.

  3. Cute, and interesting, although I'm not entirely sure how the "nobles love them but the church actively hunts them down and destroys them" dynamic could remain stable for any significant length of time. Something's got to give, soon.

    1. Nobles also love exotic drugs, fucking summoned succubi at parties, reading forbidden (and accurate) history books, and meddling in the divine rights of kings. They do these things, and there is instability, but they still do them.

  4. suggestion: noble manor abandoned, maybe some kind of curse. being the rational and scientifically-minded people they are, surrounding townsfolk refuse to enter. after five or ten years or so, PCs enter the manor to find a mass of competing velveteen fiefdoms, warring for supremacy and eager to recruit and/or kill the new giant intruders.