Thursday, August 9, 2018

d20 More Magic Artifacts

I wrote 20 more artifacts.  (Here's the first batch.)  Some of them aren't really artifacts, but most of them are.  (Here's the first batch.)

21.  A black cube of basalt, floating 10' off the ground.  It is 5' across and hinged like a chest.  Anything placed inside it will be dehydrated (all liquids bursting from the seams of the cube as if from a juicer) and converted into an art object.  Rare objects and powerful creatures are converted into more elaborate (more valuable) art.  Most are easily transportable.

22. A mummified monkey's paw.  While you wear it, you will hear small footsteps trailing behind you.  No other evidence of a monkey will ever manifest.  If you leave a bowl of sour milk out overnight, the "monkey" will attempt to bring you a nearby object that you desire.  It has the same chance of success as a regular monkey of human intelligence would if you sent it out on a similar mission.  If the monkey would be successful, the item appears in your pockets in the morning.  It item doesn't actually move, it teleports along with the effect.  You must offer the monkey something every night.  If you fail to do so, you will take 3d6 damage as the monkey attempts to strangle you and the paw will never work for you again.

23. Tightly-wound scroll of Goxlagon (Ogremoch, basically), the primordial earth demon.  If dropped on the floor, it bursts open and the words spill out, covering the floor (up to 2500 sq. ft.) with thousands of copies of his name.  Anyone falling on the floor (even falling prone) takes an additional 2d6 fall damage as if they had fallen an additional 30 feet.  Actual fall damage is quadrupled.

24. Circlet of the Diplomat.  When you would be struck a mortal blow (dropped to 0 HP) by a sentient creature, time pauses while you two communicate telepathically for 2 hours.  After this time, the attacker (usually paused with their blade an inch from your neck) can follow through with the blow, or choose to do something else.

25. Telluric Dagger.  Reflects stars and nothing else.  When stabbed,  you take damage based on how far you are from where you were born.  Within a day's travel = 1d4 damage.  Less than a week away = 1d8 damage.  Less than a month away = 2d6.  Less than a year away = 2d8.  Longer than that = 3d6.

26.  Cones of Alternate Self.  Summons a version of you from another timeline.  The alternate version is fucked up in some one (gain a random disability).  You can control both characters, but the original will begin to painfully melt, taking 1d6 damage every turn.  ("What's wrong with this place?  What's wrong with your air?")  This is psychically traumatizing for you, and each time you use it, you must Save or gain the (imagined) disability of your dead clone.

27. Ring of the Fool.  When worn, your face becomes innocent and trustworthy (+4 to any roll that benefits from you being likable and trustworthy).  You die the first time you take damage.  You gain double XP.

28. Hand Mirror of Lies.  Whoever holds it controls what it shows.

by Cosmic Nuggets

29. The Hunting Sound.  There is a room in the Ziggurat of Khuum where you must never speak.  If you do, the Hunting Sound will hear your voice and begin to seek you.  Space is no obstacle.  You will hear it coming for you.  At first you will only hear it in the quiet of the night, but as it nears you will hear it more often, louder and closer.  It is a groaning and a creaking and a grinding and a certain murmur that sounds like muffled screaming coming from underground.  After 1d6+4 days, it will catch you, and it will pull you into its chambers through a fist-sized hold in the air.  It's a bit like a chicken breast being sucked through a keyhole.  The people of the Ziggurat use the Hunting Noise to assassinate their enemies, combined with exceptionally accurate parrots.

30 . Ambrosia.  A vial of glittering orange froth that confers the powers of godhood.  After 1 turn, you gain the power to cast firebolt at will.  After 2 turns, you gain the power of flight.  After 3 turns, you become locally omniscient (range 50').  After 4 turns you gain an extra 50 hit points.  After 5 turns, you become aware that this world and everyone on it is utterly trivial in the cosmic scale of things, and that every soul here is wasting their time for as long as they remain trapped in this banal soul-trap of life and 'death".  You spend the round stunned, telling your companions what you have learned.  Beginning on the 6th turn, you must make a Save every turn to resist the temptation to turn into a being of pure light and depart the universe forever.

31. Fossilized Angel Egg.  Blackened as smooth as oiled leather.  Hold it tightly to your chest and think bad thoughts about someone.  It appears in their stomach.  1d6 turns later, they spend a turn painfully regurgitating it (stunned for a turn).  On the surface of the egg is written a secret of theirs.

32.  The Enigma.  Defies description.  Attempts to learn more about it result rapidly results in madness.  All that is known is that it fits into a single inventory slot.  Best not to look at it too closely.

33. Ossuglop.  A thick wax that rapidly increases the weight of things (up to 100x).  No effect on organic material.  It is stored in a goat bladder bag.

34. The Sword of War.  On a hit, target must save or take an additional 3d6 damage.  If the target dies from this damage, the wielder must also save or take the same damage.  The sword is sheathed in a great and glorious red banner, which flies above the wielder's head in battle.

by Cosmic Nuggets

35. The Sword of Peace.  Deals an additional 3d6 damage.  Anyone who possesses it will desire nothing more than to seek solitude and quiet.  Anyone who interferes with this reasonable desire will be met with rapidly escalating violence.  The sword appears to be made of wood, impossibly sharpened to such a degree that the cutting edge is nearly translucent.

36. A set of three nearly translucent knives.  They pass through objects without leaving a trace.  When a knife is broken (they are as fragile as glass), every cut that it has made manifests as real.

37. The Sun's Eye.  An iron sphere that is perpetually red-hot.  When held in your bare hands, you can control the sun.  Position, brightness, proximity, etc.  When you gaze through it, you can see from the sun's perspective.  (This does not actually move the sun--it merely bends light in an ingenious way.)

(A similar frozen orb controls the moon.)

38. Space Grenade.  Resembles a bunch of needles jammed into a glass sphere, with a steel thread through the center that is pulled to activate the grenade.  When it detonates, all space within 20' is magnified 1000x.  If it explodes in a 20' diameter room, the room is now 20,000' feet across.  If it explodes in a 30' diameter room, the room is 20,010' feet across the center and 92' feet to the far side if you stay along the wall.  Visually, it resembles a strange lensing effect, and yet humans can safely comprehend the non-Euclidean space in front of them.  Objects are scattered by the expanded space, but surfaces are tessellated outwards to account for the new expanse of space.  (You don't get giant blades of grass, you get more grass.)

39. Ring of the Hallucination.  Resembles a reticulated band that continually crawls across your finger like a tiny treadmill.  When you wear it, you become a pseudo-hallucination.  The only real effect that this has is that you cease existing when no one is looking at you.  You can remove the ring normally, but only while you exist.  (Basically, you just vanish when you are alone, or when no one is paying attention to you.  When they return their attention to your location with the expectation of seeing you, you reappear.)

40. Wizard Egg.  When a wizard learns too much about spells, the knowledge infects and recombines inside his subconscious.  As his mind is eaten, newborn spells flee into the ether.  Occasionally, the runt of the litter gets tangled up in the wizard's physical matter and is too weak to escape.

Wizard eggs are laid by wizards who are in the late stages of wizard madness.  (This is not the strangest symptom.)  During the most exciting part of each session, the egg has a 2-in-6 chance of hatching.  (Basically, the DM says "this seems exciting, let's see if the egg hatches. It can happen 2x in a session if you really want it to.)  When an egg hatches, roll a d12 to see what it contains.
  1. A minor magic item.  Roll randomly.
  2. A major magic artifact.  Roll randomly.
  3. A baby monster.  Probably trainable.  Roll randomly.
  4. A swiftly growing adult monster.  Probably aggressive.  Roll randomly.
  5. A sudden turn of bad luck.  The magic sword breaks, the dungeon boss enters the room, etc.  
  6. A sudden turn of good luck.  The bad guys scatter, the dead PC wakes up, etc.
  7. A lump of gold shaped like the wizard.
  8. Cloudkill shaped like the wizard's face.
  9. Everyone loses 1000 XP.
  10. Everyone gains 1000 XP.
  11. A spellbook full of mutant spells, based on what the wizard had memorized.
  12. A living spell spirit.  It's basically a HD 1 pokemon.  It's friendly, and if the dead wizard was friends with one of the PCs, the spell spirit will inherit that affection.  They usually look like either a fishbird or a birdfish, with some of the dead wizard's features and personality quirks.  The spell spirit can cast one of the spells that the wizard knew, and its form is influenced by the inherited spell.  For example, a divination spirit might have enormous eyes and the wizard's mustache.  They each have 1 casting die.
by Cosmic Nuggets


  1. I love the Sword of War and the Sword of Peace. There is a nice irony to the idea of a sword that makes you desire nothing but peace but also very good at killing, or a Sword used for war making it difficult to kill your enemies.

    And the rest of them, they're so evocative and creative. I can't wait to stuff a chest full of these and wait for someone to dig them out.