Monday, January 8, 2018

The Castle at the End of the World, Part 2

How Windows Work

There are a lot of windows in this dungeon, even in places where it wouldn't make sense to put a window (between two dungeon room, for example).  Look out a window and you might see a sunny field, despite being five levels down in this architectural orgy.

The windows are all glass.  Break one, and cold water rushes in, filling the room from floor to ceiling.  The water will not leave the room, although a trickle will puddle on the floors of the adjacent rooms.  Roll for a random encounter, as well, as a sharkman may come inside, investigating.

Like most things in the castle, the window will reset on the full moon.


Functions as morale for all of the NPCs back at your home base.  You can raise comfort by giving your NPCs amenities: bonfires, beds, tables, celebrations, marriages.  Things that lower comfort are deaths, overcrowding, and hunger.

You can alleviate overcrowding by raising the Castle out of the ocean, causing the home base to gain new levels.


Roll a d12 every day.

1-2 Heavy Rain.  Roll a d6 for weather tomorrow.  If you roll heavy rain two days in a row, a Storm occurs instead.

3-4 Light Rain.  Roll a d6 for weather tomorrow.

5-6 Windy.

7-8 Windy.

9-10 Clear.

11-12 Clear.

After you break the Weather Lock on Level 4, roll a d20 for weather instead.

13-14 Heavy Rain.  Roll a d6 for weather tomorrow.  If you roll heavy rain two days in a row, a Storm occurs instead.

15-16 Ice.  The sea freezes over.  Icebergs gather, and moon-eyed creatures watch from the crags above.  Roll on the Ice Encounter table.

17-18 Weird Rain.  D6: 1 stones, 2 dead versions of everyone (free meat, but don’t eat yourself), 3 blood, 4 oil, 5 the Edgeless Sharp, 6 random cooking spice (cinnamon).

19-20 Predatory Cloud.  Anyone outside can be subjected to a blast of wind which lifts them bodily away, carrying them into the cloud above.  The cloud then turns pink as it begins to feed.  Eventually, the desiccated corpse will be dropped back down, usually in an open spot where the cloud hopes to bait someone into a second feeding.

Tower of the Second Favorite Princess

She has discovered that when she is absent from court, her father will dream a new Princess.  And so the princesses have been conspiring together, striving to stay away from court, covertly gaining in numbers.  They intend to wait until there are enough of them to conquer the entire dungeon. 

Like everything else in here, however, they have a poor memory, and do not realize that they reached the population cap a while ago, having run out of food.  Now they are quietly cannibalizing each other, and constantly conducting a meaningless census.

This section of the dungeon is decorated like a princess’ bedroom.

King Zorbachi the Torturer

A master of torture, his people elevated it to an artform.  In the twisted halls of his pain palace, he constantly tortures dream-clones of himself.  He is paranoid, and suspects that these imposters are some subtle machination of the sorcerer-king.

So yeah, mad torture maze full of a bearded, blood-speckled king endlessly torturing himself.

Clanhold of King Gorgu

Hill giants.  They are in the middle of a coup, and so two factions are trying to assassinate each other.  In the middle of the great hall, they have built an ark.  It is filled with nothing but pigs.

Flower Palace

The elves are throwing a dinner party.  They expect that the tidal wave will be quite beautiful when it arrives.  Marine couture is visible everywhere.  No one is worried.  They have devised clever magics that will protect them from the ravening sea.  They are utterly unconcerned about whatever counterstroke the sorcerer-king is enacting.  No significant magic has ever been performed by anyone less than a century old.

I'm gonna write sex rules for D&D.  I swear I'm gonna do it.  No more pussyfooting.  No more beating around the bush.  There's gonna be rules for an elf orgy.  I'm gonna do it.

Floating Fort of the Sea Prince

Similarly unconcerned about the coming flood.  Why should he be concerned?  He has the largest fleet of ships on the known ocean.

Full of pirates, opium, sirens, kidnapped princes, pagan weddings, excecutions, magic tattoos, and traps.

The nice thing about this dungeon level is that it has an internal ocean.  The different rooms of this dungeon floor are actually islands. 

If you have the corundum compass, you can sail from this false ocean out to the real ocean outside, effectively making this a shortcut back to this level of the dungeon.


  1. I look forward to "Orgies & Orgasms"

  2. I've been following you for years, patiently awaiting the day you finally write your sex rules!

  3. I hope you cement this into a pdf campaign. It's looking really interesting.

  4. In all seriousness, can you actually take a stab at sex rules? Mine were hastily cobbled together out of necessity and there's a dearth of reference material.

    1. I am genuinely curious what game-mechanical challenges and rewards people are wanting sex to have. Is it just, like, roll to see if you were good or disappointing? If you crit does it count as a charm effect? What are we after here?

  5. Now I want to know what the sharkfolk think of all this.